I made a new acquaintance.  This said acquaintance has a birthday coming up in about a month.  So, they asked me what I planned on getting them for their birthday o_O  So…in my new efforts to not be a bitch all of the time (lol), instead of a flat out “nothing” I did offer to cook this person their favorite meal.  Since they know I likes to cook, they really appreciated this suggestion.  Aaaaand since they themselves don’t cook, like anything…at all (o_O again) they were super enthused!  Yall know I aims to please lol!

Sooooooo…this is the story, of Oscar and how he came into my life.  It’s really a funny and interesting tale of love, sex, and magic. Ok not really but its still pretty funny.

So me and said acquaintance met up for a lil chat n chew at a cozy spot on Slatters Lane in Alexandria-yall prolly know the spot I’m talmbout.  We chatted…we chewed… and it was fun. So when they brought up their upcoming birthday (again) and asked what I was getting them (again), I reminded them of my promise to cook for them.  See, to me, MY word really is my bond.  I know that’s like a waning standard these days, but chial that’s another post for another time.  Again, I digress 🙂

Skip to this story, as told by my understanding of the way my acquaintance told it, which I found absolutely HI-Larry-ous!!! Note: while I may have put this in my own words, they really did use some of these phrases.

Well initially my thought was fried chicken but that’s not good enough.  Fried chicken is wack and you can cook that for me later (oh, really so you think I’mma just be cooking for you on the regular tho?).  What I really want is this:  so…a few years ago I was living in Maine…blah blah blah…it gets lonely there…etc etc etc…vacation houses up on stilts on the beach (ok get to the point knee grow!).  I went to this restaurant and asked the waitress what was good.  When she replied ‘everything’ we had an exciting exchange about how everything couldn’t be good and she maintained that indeed, everything was good.  When I asked what her favorite dish was and what she would recommend, she replied with two words that would forever change my life: Chicken. Oscar.  Well alright then bring me the chicken oscar.  (Ok this is where it gets interesting) Now, Ronica, this was not some small thing, this is not your favorite movie that you’ve seen 100 times and on the 101th time you get tired of it, this was something like a phenomenon.  It was a sauteed chicken cutlet atop a bed of garlic red skinned mashed potatoes topped with lump crab meat and hollandaise sauce, with asparagus on the side. Before having this dish I was a virgin and it popped my cherry right then and there in the restaurant that fateful night.  It changed my life. Forever. And ever. It was monumental. But now I’ve put too much pressure on you (oh, really?) so yeah fried chicken is ok-you can just cook that. o_O

Ok so I’m kind of a big deal in the kitchen tho.  You must not know bout me, like at all.  Not saying I’m like a ‘Top Chef’ kinda cook, but a bish can burn.  And I feel like there’s nothing that I really can’t cook, or at least that I can think of.  I feel that in general if someone can cook then they can cook, period.  So needless to say I took this as a personal challenge.  So when we parted ways it was off to Wegman’s to get the stuff I needed to make this dish.

For the first time ever I’m debuting something I’ve never cooked before up until now.  So here is my version of Chicken Oscar.

Chicken Oscar


  • 1/2 c all purpose flour
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 1/2 tsp black pepper
  • 2 tbsp paprika
  • 1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
  • a pinch of cinnamon (yes cinnamon)
  • 1 tsp garlic powder
  • 1 bunch of asparagus
  • olive oil
  • 1 stick (1/2 c) unsalted butter
  • 6 or so chicken cutlets, either thinly sliced or pounded thin
  • 1 lb lump crabmeat
  • Hollandaise sauce (I’ll post that in a separate recipe yall)
  • Red-skinned garlic mashed potatoes (again, separate recipe)

Prepare the flour mixture: in a shallow pan add the flour, salt, pepper, paprika, cayenne pepper, cinnamon, and garlic powder and mix to combine.  You can season your flour however you like, but these are the things that I typically use when cooking chicken.

Be sure to WASH your chicken cutlets thoroughly.  If you didn’t buy the thinly sliced ones and you wanna be all fancy and actually pound out your own chicken, then here’s how you do that:  place a boneless, skinless chicken breast between 2 pieces of wax or parchment paper and pound them with a meat cleaver.  Ok if you don’t have a meat cleaver then use a heavy cast iron skillet.  Don’t beat it to death! We just wanna tenderize it a little…

Melt the butter in a heavy skillet over medium high heat and add a little olive oil.  This will slow the butter down from burning since olive oil has a higher smoke point than butter.

Drench a piece of chicken in the flour mixture and add it to the pan.  Pan fry this until golden brown on both sides, about 10 mins but use your judgement here.   Remove the chicken from the pan to drain and repeat until you’ve cooked all of your chicken.

In a separate pot, bring some water to a boil and salt it.  Add the asparagus to blanch it (just until the green color intensifies) Remove from boiling water and season with salt and pepper or however you like.

Now to build the plate:

Start with the mashed potatoes:                Next, Add a chicken cutlet:

Layer the asparagus:

Then add the Hollandaise Sauce:

Oh shit, forgot the lump crab meat…bring that back and add the crab on top of the chicken breast like so:

Ok now add the asparagus and more Hollandaise sauce to top it all off.  And here you have it!!!

Again, I’ll be sure to let yall know how this actually tastes.  Being that I’ve never made this I can’t fully endorse it.  I may have to tweak the recipe and get back to you.  But if any of you try this before I get a chance to post and update then please let me know your thoughts!  Happy eating!